Inspiration

I really started trusting this self-realization thing when i visited for the first time the MahaSamadhi (the place where the dead body of a realized soul stays) of Anandamayi Ma, in Haridwar, north India. She left her body in her constant state of meditation many years ago, but still the energy there is pure bliss. I felt no fear, no doubts, only that I was welcome. I usually feel fear in new places, but there I was energetically accepted, or accepting. There was only God and my thoughts, that I could observe with love. And then I heard that there was someone incarnated with such an energy: Amma, in south india. One week after I was in the train to Kerala. When I'm really close to her, I don't think she's better or worst. All the judgments and comparations cease. Peace remains. All the times that she ever looked at me, I really felt she was looking at herself. And the heart opens. So much that I become more and more sensitive to my own judgments and comparations (and to external judgments too), at a point it's unbearable. That's why I keep taking trains and flights to be with her: to develop space in my sistem to have this bliss of humblennes and no comparation. Only unity. Even though I notice that some 'devotees', including me, are sometimes proud and thinking they are special to have such a master (and this can be annoying), I try to consider this comparation with other Gurus as just a stage of the journey. I know somehow that there is only one Guru, taking diferent forms for each person. I hope to one day look at everyone like Amma looks at me, and to trully humbly recognize the master everywhere... And here I am in a train for more than 30 hours, still having to wait some more hours to arrive in her ashram. Thank you, Amma, for your inspiring humblennes, that makes me move. Jai Ma